It’s safe to say that at this time in my life I’m the happiest I’ve ever been. My enthusiasm for life and general vitality is returning to childhood levels. But far from living in an immature way, I am finding my path in life and following it. Most people think of maturity as finding a stable job, getting a partner, settling down, but it is so much more than that. Real maturity is learning to live through love and walking your true path.
I spent the past year going to events, partying, socializing, and living a busy schedule. As of a few months ago, I am now living down south in the quiet town of Kiama, studying and producing music in my spare time and not doing any socializing or partying at all. Yet funnily enough, I am more happy now than I was back then. This is because I have truly started to know myself and my place in the world. After a lot of self-inquiry I have really started to drop my barriers of inner resistance and relax into the moment, living in a pure and free state of mind. I have been moving in this direction over the course of my whole life, but recently it has been increasing exponentially so.
One reason for this is that I have found music as a creative outlet. By making music and sharing it with the world I really feel that I am playing my part in making the world a better place. People are so busy going about their daily lives, living to work and working to live, that they stagnate and don’t have any room to create. Creativity is the drive of the universe to move ever onward and music plays its own unique part in the evolution of the world. When people stagnate and choose to work a job they don’t like just so that they can have financial security to pay their bills, they feel out of place and disconnected. This is because they are just stagnating and contributing to the stagnation of the whole world. Imagine if you sat in a room all day without doing anything, wouldn’t your body and mind feel restless? Well it’s the same thing with creativity except it’s your soul that becomes restless.
Another reason is that I have started to truly understand the meaning of love. If I look back on past romantic relationships I can see that although they brought me so much happiness, it wasn’t a happiness and inner peace that came from the deepest place of knowing myself. I wasn’t at a stage of emotional maturity where I could truly see it for what it was without clinging to it and letting it consume me. I have come to see that love is not as simple as a feeling that is created between two people- that is attachment. Love is instead feeling the infinite truth of existence unobstructed by the barriers of your mind. A relationship will help you to feel love, but we should never get it confused with love itself. It will bring you many things- affection, excitement, energy, companionship and a better understanding of yourself, but it can only take you so far. Past a certain point, only you can walk the path of self inquiry to truly discover who you are.
Sadly, most people in this day and age think that love is something that is created only in relationships. That is why we become obsessed with finding the perfect relationship and it is also why we become so devastated when it inevitably ends. We cling to relationships because it’s the only way we know how to love. It becomes such an emotional vortex because we assume that a relationship will answer all their questions and solve all of their problems. But that is simply a delusion. Love is never given to you by the other person, it is a place within you and within ALL things. The more you start to experience universal love, the less you will cling to a romantic relationship in order to find this truth.
It is far easier to find love through another person then it is to find love within yourself. To find love within yourself you need to go deep within and let go of the barriers you have built between yourself and the world. To do that is difficult and scary and painful and takes a lot of time and effort. Everyone is afraid to look within because they won’t like what they see. But it’s also the only way you can ever be truly free. THE ONLY WAY! Once you have done that, you are then free to return to a relationship to share the love that you have, instead of taking love from the other person. You will then be able to navigate a relationship with balance and ease because love is always alive inside you.
Love and attachment are two opposite ends of the spectrum, yet we constantly get them mixed up. So don’t cling to a relationship in order to find true love. Instead ask yourself who YOU really are. Find out what love really means. Only you can answer those questions. Don’t forget, we are all born into a state of purity and love. It is only our society that teaches us to fear the future and hold onto the past, destroying the beauty and potential of the present moment. There is a great peace and stillness to be found in knowing yourself.